BeardedandMonotoned

Here at BeardedandMonotoned, we believe that a good ol’...

Mon, 14 Feb 2011 11:19:00 -0500

Here at BeardedandMonotoned, we believe that a good ol’ fashioned raping makes for good music. Therefore we started our own band and made this song. Click the pic for more.

The best hitchhiker ever hails from Manassas, Virginia. Oh yes.

Sun, 09 Jan 2011 16:17:44 -0500

The best hitchhiker ever hails from Manassas, Virginia.

Oh yes.

You’re on Tumblr: Check. You live in Manassas:...

Fri, 31 Dec 2010 18:07:27 -0500

You’re on Tumblr: Check.

You live in Manassas: Check.

Well, looks like you meet the criteria for being in love with McKay’s here in lovely Manassas, VA. We’ve come to the conclusion that everyone fucking loves this place even if you hate everything it contains and stands for…. That’s just how it works… So on a list of Shit to Do in Manassas, we felt it’d be a crime to leave out one of the number one places that people go to in order to look smart but not have to pay Border’s prices. It’s McKay’s and there’s a little something for everyone…. EVERYONE.

Also, fuck Dan Brown.

Our newest video. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch...

Sun, 19 Dec 2010 12:00:07 -0500

Our newest video. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it. Watch it.

With THAT many “Watch it’s” you HAVE to. Plus it’s not even a minute long. Take the time to laugh you heartless commie.

The weather’s getting colder here in Manassas, but...

Wed, 08 Dec 2010 12:00:07 -0500

The weather’s getting colder here in Manassas, but that’s not stopping us from finding some Shit to Do. Is it night time on a Monday and you’re bored to the point that you’re considering Kobaining yourself? Don’t fret. Put the shotgun down because Monday is the night of the week when game stores have midnight launches for crazy popular games. ThatOneGuy and Monotoned hit up their local Manassas game store to check out the midnight launch of the ever popular “World of Warcraft: Cataclysm”, and we learn firsthand that we should probably stay far away from that game at all times…. Enjoy.

Monotoned and ThatOneGuy stumble upon the darker side of...

Tue, 07 Dec 2010 13:43:07 -0500

Monotoned and ThatOneGuy stumble upon the darker side of Manassas when we were looking for some more legal Shit to Do. C’mon man, not with the CHILDREN! I’m pretty sure we need those…. The Guys Catch a Predator.

"We here at BeardedandMonotoned don’t usually “wish people a happy holiday,”..."

Thu, 25 Nov 2010 13:29:48 -0500

“We here at BeardedandMonotoned don’t usually “wish people a happy holiday,” because that’s just lame, but Thanksgiving’s the greatest fucking holiday of the year. How are we celebrating? By calling people Jive Turkeys.”

Shit to Do in Manassas is BACK….. again… This go...

Fri, 05 Nov 2010 14:15:24 -0400

Shit to Do in Manassas is BACK….. again… This go around, we scour the night to find the best things Manassas has to offer after hours when the sun goes down. Thankfully we have some 24 hour joints, or this would be a short video, and there’s some other fun shit we ran into along the way. So basically, if you sit around at home doing nothing on the weekend like a sad nothing, not only are your weekends similar to Monotoned’s, but you could also benefit from knowing what shit there is to do at night in this damn place. Enjoy.

We have a fifth cast member of BeardedandMonotoned who had been...

Mon, 01 Nov 2010 19:45:31 -0400

We have a fifth cast member of BeardedandMonotoned who had been missing and seemingly kidnapped despite the claim that fat people are harder to kidnap….. But then, one warm October night, we found where he’s been hiding…

This Friday, Shit to Do in Manassas is back and we’re...

Mon, 01 Nov 2010 18:15:06 -0400

This Friday, Shit to Do in Manassas is back and we’re ready to let you know just what there really is to do in Manassas…. This time we hit the night to find out the answer to that burning question, “What is there to do at night in Manassas?”. Fortunately we didn’t get stabbed.

This Friday. Be ready.

For those not yet aware, we here at BeardedandMonotoned felt...

Wed, 27 Oct 2010 12:02:41 -0400

For those not yet aware, we here at BeardedandMonotoned felt it’d be right to announce that our fine Manassas Mall Walmart is now open 24 hours, 7 days a week. So yeah, if you ever wanna meet up with us in Walmart at 3:00 AM, just let us know.

Manassas: A place where beauty is achieved by...

Tue, 26 Oct 2010 13:51:42 -0400

Manassas: A place where beauty is achieved by squinting.

Asians must love it here.

Fuck yes! The old Facebook fan page has finally reached 100...

Tue, 26 Oct 2010 12:00:42 -0400

Fuck yes! The old Facebook fan page has finally reached 100 fans! Sure, in comparison to the REST of Facebook, just 100 fans sucks, but fuck the rest of Facebook right? We here at BeardedandMonotoned are pretty satisfied… We’ll keep cranking out the goods as we’re continuing to produce more “Shit to Do in Manassas”, and we’ll keep you constantly updated on the Tumblr page, the Facebook page and the Twitter. Yeah, we’re just about everywhere, haha.

"I should start praying to Buddha, I heard he’s more tech savvy…"

Mon, 25 Oct 2010 10:03:05 -0400

“I should start praying to Buddha, I heard he’s more tech savvy…”

- Monotoned after asking God why he has no Internet

So, Monotoned bought Fallout: New Vegas.

Tue, 19 Oct 2010 12:11:53 -0400

So, Monotoned bought Fallout: New Vegas.

Where to go next for “Shit to Do in Manassas”?...

Sat, 16 Oct 2010 12:03:51 -0400

Where to go next for “Shit to Do in Manassas”? That’s the question.

Here at BeardedandMonotoned, we’re up for suggestions. Are you from Manassas? Do you watch “Shit to Do in Manassas”? If you said, “yes” to both of these questions, then do we the thing for you. On the other hand, if you said, “No”, then I’m sort of wondering why you’re still reading this… But yeah, back to the point. Since we figured a lot of our viewers may come from the Manassas/NOVA area, we figured they could throw some suggestions at us for where we should do “Shit to Do in Manassas” next.

Think of your favorite hangout spots, somewhere you spend a lot of your time when you’re NOT in front of a computer screen. Or you could suggest somewhere that you’d think would be really cool if it to got a segment on YouTube…….. You could even suggest somewhere you’d never go around here yourself, that you’d want us to. We just don’t give a fuck.

Click the picture above to go straight to our little asking box thing, and let’s hear what you got!

Whoa. We were so caught up in the release of the newest Shit to...

Sat, 16 Oct 2010 00:04:27 -0400

Whoa. We were so caught up in the release of the newest Shit to Do in Manassas, that we failed to realize that Bearded’s most popular food challenge video has finally broken 100 views. Hats off to the occasionally Bearded one— he earned it. If you’re unfamiliar with what we’re going on about, Bearded shoveled through ten Flatliner wings at the Buffalo Wing Factory. Not an easy feat…. It’s also not the easiest meal to keep in your stomach either… as the video demonstrates…

Shit to Do in Manassas is back, and this time the guys are at...

Fri, 15 Oct 2010 12:50:00 -0400

Shit to Do in Manassas is back, and this time the guys are at Manassas Mall. Manassas Mall is known for its….. Walmart… I guess, but we decided to go around and find some of the brighter points of the mall. Due to a severe lack of white people, finding brighter points was tough, so we settled on finding somewhat dimmed points. That’s where the magic started to happen, and all without the help of Magic Man. Whoa. So click the pic up above, sit back, relax, if you’re a chick then get undressed, and watch as we find you some Shit to Do in Manassas….. Mainly because you’re in Manassas and have nothing better to do.

Tell me I’m wrong.

We figured that since some may be new to the series, we’d...

Thu, 14 Oct 2010 02:39:24 -0400

We figured that since some may be new to the series, we’d lay some of our older stuff on them so they can get a taste of some classic BeardedandMonotoned. In this video, Monotoned describes the way that Japanese Porn works….. and sadly enough, does it pretty accurately…

"Here at BeardedandMonotoned, if you have tits, you’re legal."

Wed, 13 Oct 2010 01:54:32 -0400

“Here at BeardedandMonotoned, if you have tits, you’re legal.”

- A Classic Quote from Bearded